Archive for March, 2004

Playing around last night, I got three guys to run a little script I wrote. The result? Check it out! [his site] is SUSPENDED ^_^

Ok, one quick note. TheBlackAlbum and ShynePo are idiots, yes. But heck, can’t I have a little fun? Ok, here’s a picture I made, entirely for your enjoyment. In case you’re not entirely sure what it’s about, I’ll take a second to explain. TheBlackAlbum and ShynePo are AIM screen names of two guys (17 years of age, I believe). They act a lot alike and are most likely gay. Thankfully, I’ve never met either of these two, but they have fun harassing me for no apparent reason. They’re quick to yell out random (and usually completely garbled) computer jargon while they say they’re hacking me. Humm, last I checked, I didn’t think microsoft paint had hacking capabilities, then again, I guess I could be wrong. Anyway, here’t the picture. I think I did a decent job, don’t you? If you haven’t noticed already, look closely at the girl’s shirt. Read it. See? It says “1337 hacker” on it. I think ShynePo and TheBlackAlbum are about to be hacked by this little girl. How cute. I hope you like it! Now, back to the blog.

I believe I have turned back into an aggressive blogger! In my past months and years, I’ve averaged about three blogs a week. Now, I seem to be continuously posing about six blogs a week. Then again, my blogging rate time ratio fluctuates greatly and sometimes without any warning, so I guess it’s just a temporary feeling of accomplishment. I’m writing this post in the morning. I just got back from class and am taking a little bit of time to eat lunch and get some homework out of the way before I go to work. Work, humm, an interesting subject there. I used to work Mondays and Wednesdays but I had to stop Wednesday because I have a lot of classes on Thursday with due homework and it got to be too much. With my morning classes on Wednesday then work in the afternoon, I didn’t have time Wednesday night to get all of my stuff done. Basically I’m down to one day a week. Monday mornings after my class and some homework / studying I go to work at 1. I have class and have to leave work by 4. That’s three hours. A measly three hours! I only work twelve hours a month now. At this point, I think it might be best to snip the wire and hop back on the job in the summer. I’m not sure if my few work hours will help my position or strain it. I really don’t want to lose the opportunity, because it’s a great place to work (when I don’t have school to try to work around!). It will still probably be open this summer, so I’ll be able to work full time for a few weeks, at least until summer school starts. Yeah, anyway, enough about that. I have to get something off my chest. No, it’s not my shirt (sorry webcammers!)

I’m amazed every day by some of the people that IM me! I think the gas from a massive brain fart is bubbling through their head when they are typing their instant messages to me. I can’t think of any other logical explanation from the level of stupidity I get. I guess it’s happened this way before, but it’s finally really getting to me because I can’t respond. I’m still on my thirty days of no instant messaging and have sworn to myself not to talk on AIM (although I have allowed a few important messages to seep through, and I try to keep them quick). When people IM me stupidities, I really have to fight the urge to respond and completely rip them apart for frustrating me so much. It’s just… I don’t know what it is with these people! I’m still getting the, “Scott, I know you’re not IMing for 30 days, but can you break it just once to help me fix my computer?” IMs! It’s like… I just want to take a chainsaw and slice their skull horizontally and peel off the top and look down in their head and scream, “hellOOoo anyone home?” Come on people, think. You complete strangers who think I owe it to you to help you with your little computer problem? Think man. You [all] are what I’m trying to get away from; not break my rules to talk to! Ok, enough of this, I’m getting mad. Grr. Ok, I’ll let you hear what happened at school this morning. Afterthought: the Chinese symbol in that picture is (or should be, at least) the actively expressed (as if ’said’) form of concentration. In other words, it’s “think!” Oh yeah, readers, comment on this post and tell me what you think of the image alignment. Should I align them all right? left? alternate? random?

I had a math test this morning. Math is usually one of my stronger subjects. I can usually just sit in a class and watch the professor do some problems on the board and it sticks. However, just in case, I got to class a little early so I had some time to go over some problems and practice working them. When the professor got there, she handed out the first section of the test. The tests in this class are split in half. The first half is a non-calculator section. You’re supposed to do the advanced evaluations and graphics from everything you know in your head. Only after you finish this section, turn it in, and get the second half of your test can you use a calculator. Given a calculator through the whole test, I could probably effortlessly stumble through the whole thing and get it all right, but that non-calculator section makes me study. Anyway, I thought I did pretty well on that section. I turned it in and got my calculator portion of the test. I thought I did well on that too, but (as (almost) always) I finished before everyone else. I hate that! I never know if I’m doing something wrong that made it go too fast, or if I was rushing or something. Last year I used to sit at my desk and pretend like I was working until someone else got up and turned in their work. Then I’d go. Anyway, today, I just finished it and turned it in. Then, driving home, I reflected back on the test. The test… the test… I did side one of the non calculator part pretty well… There was nothing on the back, I checked. I did side one of the calculator portion pretty well. There was a back to this one, I remember checking. I think I did pretty wel-… wait… the back… the back… I don’t remember the back… I don’t rem-… did I do the back?

There aren’t many events that could perfectly represent the mind of Scott, but I think this is one of them. While concentrating so hard on getting my answers right, did I really forget to do an entire page of the test? I panicked. I looked at my watch. I probably could make it back to the college right before the class ended (I left about an hour early!) but.. I wouldn’t have any time to finish my test. Maybe if I sobbed to her, my professor would let me finish it in the testing center. Usually the people who take tests there are those with disabilities. Uh, excuse me, I got up and left without remembering to turn the page, I’d say that proves some kind of disability. Then, all the sudden, a spark! Oh yeah, I did do that page! I remembered the problems were numbered one through six on side one, and seven through eleven on side two. I remember talking to the professor about number nine. I let out a sigh of relief, but then got a little scared again. Twenty seconds ago, I honestly thought I didn’t do half my test. What’s wrong with me? Now I know I remember doing it… but… wow… Scott… you have problems. Anyway, about number nine. I don’t remember the problem exactly, but it was some problem that required exponential (logarithmic) factoring. There was a number 58 in the problem that, right when she handed out the test, the professor wrote on the board to change that 58 to a 59. Well, how interesting. I tried it and couldn’t get it to work. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t get it to work with 59, so for kicks I tried 58. Four minutes later, the problem came out beautifully. I took it to her and asked her if I could just do the original problem, since it worked out so much better. She looked at my test, looked at my work, pulled out her calculator, did it herself… She turned all red and looked really embarrassed. She stood up and erased that part of the board and was like, “I’m so sorry!” to everyone. I don’t think anyone else had even gotten that far on the test, but it was a little interesting. Anyway, yeah, that was what it took to get me to remember, “oh yeah, I did that page”

Ghaww! I can’t believe I got tricked like that! I was all the way in Casselberry (about 45 minutes away from home) when I got a cell phone call. My mom said she was going to Sea World. My sister (three) loves sea world and talks about it constantly. She couldn’t wait to go with Scott. (I think my family also hyped-up the event for her, claiming that I like all that oceanish stuff). I decided that today would be a day as good as ever, especially since it’s going to get really hot soon, so I raced home. Dodging trees, houses, and ladies with walkers (well, all but one) I zoomed to my house. Finally I arrived just in time do drop off my laptop inside and run back out and hop in the car. Ahh, finally, Sea World, and here I go. Although I did spend a lot of time there when I was really young, I was pretty reluctant to go again, but hey, how bad could it be? It’ll be nice to get it over with, so won’t get told that I have to take Hannah (my sister) anymore. About fifteen minutes into the drive, I look back. My mom is in the car. My sister is in the car. My sister’s friend is in the car… but where’s Hannah? Once I asked, I got a dark look from my mom. It was at this moment that I started to realize that, hey, something really bad is about to happen. “We’re going to see Brad Paisley at Sea World!”… “uhh, who’s Brad Paisley?” … “We’re going to Sea World Scott!” … “no, tell me who Brad Paisley is” … After being elucidated by my mom, sister, and her friend, I was contemplating jumping out of the window of our moving vehicle in a desperate hope that I’d wake up days later in a hospital bed. Anything would be better than having to live with the fact that I was [just tricked into] going to a country music concert. Oh, I hate country. Oh… oh… /moan/. To make it worse, if course we sit right behind a row of screaming girls. Now, don’t get me wrong. Under other circumstances, being in an area of a few thousand teenage girls might not be such a bad thing… but now, today, here, for this reason? Cowgirls? Excuse me while I vomit. I figured I’d just sit in my seat and relax for a few hours. Maybe I could sleep, I thought. Then, it started. It was loud… incredibly loud. Forget about sleeping. And… /screech/ … oh those girls behind me! Somebody silence them. I figured I’d just sit there and relax anyway, at least I didn’t have to actually do anything but sit there. “Scott, go and get us drinks.” Um… I- “now.” I stood up and weaved my way through the ten people to my right to get to the isle. I was about to take off when I hear “Oh yeah, it has to be in a cup, not bottled! Except for the water, the water has to be bottled.” (pff, women.) Anyway, after walking two or three hundred miles, I eventually found a stand that sold soft drinks in cups. (Literally, it was on the other side of the park, and that park is fairly large). I found a place near there that had bottled water. How good am I!? I put the bottled water in my cargo pants pocket (it hung out a lot, but it stayed there securely) and held onto the two paper cups of iced soda. Ice… wow, that feels nice on my hands since it’s so hot. That was my view for the first five or ten seconds. Then I shifted to the “holy penguins I can’t feel my hands but they hurt anyway” view. Then, to top it off, I had to meander through crowds of people (some of which were very stinky). One thing was a little funny though. There was this girl (14, if I had to guess) who was holding a video camera at her waist. She was sitting down, and pretending like the camera wasn’t on. I saw the red button though. I watched as people (guys) walked by and I noticed she’d move her leg so the camera would follow them. How funny! This little girl is guy watching. After realizing what was happening I decided to play it cool. That’s right, Scott put on the “cool move” guy walk and, aww, he’s holding three drinks, they must be for girls; what a nice guy! I was looking at the horizon when I felt something tickle my leg. I realized I was on film, so I decided not to look down… I waited ten seconds until I knew the camera wasn’t on me, and then I looked down at my pants. Well, that’s interesting. It appears I spilled a ton of coke on the top of my pants. The way it had dribbled all the way down my leg indicated that it had been there for a little while too. Oh, wonderful, I was playing it cool in front of the camera with a curious liquid running down the entire length of my pants. To give you an idea of how far I had to walk to reach the girls at the stadium, it was completely dry by the time I got there. Yeah, so, I guess I learned my lesson. Never again will I jump in a car with family members without knowing exactly where I am going. And that’s my story tonight. I have much homework to do, so I’ll blog tomorrow. Have a good one!

As I sit down to write, I’m suddenly overwhelmed with strong waves of exhaustion. I knew I was tired (physically and mentally) but now that I sat down to start to write, I can feel it. No, it is attacking me. I will have to fight the sleep for a little while longer. I’d much like to write a decent blog tonight. Then, after it’s done, I will sleep. I won’t write a long blog tonight though; I only have a few topics I’d like to mention. So, wasting no time, here we go!

Today I was alone, all day. Actually, I was alone most of yesterday. You see, my sister had this out of town track meet thing. She went to it, along with my parents in other sister. I had the house to myself for about a day and a half. I thought I might get bored, but it was really odd, I didn’t even notice a difference. Every once and a while I’d think about the fact that it’s a little quieter than normal, but other than that, nothing changed. This could be a good thing, I guess, since I now know that if / when I move out I won’t really have a problem missing anything. On the other hand, this seems like a really bad / sad thing. My whole family left me and I didn’t even notice (care?). Actually now’s not the time to talk about caring. It’s late, I’m really tired, and I apathetically “don’t care” about everything right now! Moving on…

Yes, my computers are gone. I still have and use my laptop though. Some of you have been asking for pictures. I don’t have any high resolution pictures of my computers (or the lack thereof) but these two web cam shots should work. The dates are on it, so don’t ask me, “When was that taken?” I have zero monitors now (excluding my laptop’s LCD panel). I’d say that I’m adjusting pretty well. I haven’t missed it yet. I did get really angry earlier today though. This morning I became incredibly frustrated with my laptop [running on my windows XP partition] because it was so slow and unstable. I’m used to Linux where I can fly from screen to screen and launch apps left and right and do everything at once. I was trying to use mozilla firefox, internet explorer (file browsing), virtual dub (rebuilding the frame index of a damaged avi) and I tried to open Photoshop. Suddenly, my computer just… slowed down so much it was almost completely frozen. I say this because the mouse would move, but nothing else would work. I mentally cursed my laptop, and then apologized to it after I realized it was the crummy operating system’s fault. Anyhow, I’m really not satisfied with this situation, but I can’t think of anything better to do. I just… I don’t know. Failure isn’t an option. It comes bundled with Microsoft products. omg… Just so you know, I’m writing this blog in MS word then copy/pasting it into my blog (so I can have spellcheck). When I typed the word Microsoft, it automatically capitalized it. Ahh! I feel infected. No, infested!

Tonight I watched a movie on TV that I really enjoyed. I was surprised I liked it so much. I saw a commercial for it earlier today and decided to come back tonight and watch it. The movie was called “Whale Rider” and it premiered on /looks left/ … /looks right/… Oh! Nono, that’s what it appeard on. “Oh!”, you know, the former “WE”, the women’s entertainment channel? Hey, shut up. It takes a real man to watch women’s entertainment television. Anyway, the movie was pretty cool. The preview of the film makes it look like a “save the whales” story, but it’s far from that. Anyone who knows me well knows that I get really irritated when I see things (especially in public media) trying to play up some hype about environmental hysteria. Shoot the friggin’ whales. Slice up those manatees! I laughed when Babi’s momma died. Anyway, this film was really cool, and the little girl that was the main character was amazing! Her acting was incredible, and I was awed by the scenery. The movie takes place in New Zealand (where most of the lord of the rings was filmed) and had some awesome locations. The camera angles in this movie were something that really stood out to me. It didn’t seem like the cookie-cutter style American movie. It had that… soft… almost French style of monologue narration combined with somewhat first person view camera angles. If you like dramas, you should check out the movie. I really enjoyed it. A preview is located at [http://iconmovies.co.uk/whalerider/trailermain.html]. It is a movie based on a novel. Hmm, my Battle Royale book is almost done… nah, forget it. It was a good movie… but I don’t think it was good enough to make me wan to actually read about it. Oh yeah, one more thing. The picture you see to the left… that’s a girl, not a guy ^_-

Well I say that’s about it for tonight. Tomorrow I might write more, or I might not. We’ll see what happens. I’m planning on meeting Rei tomorrow to give him some of my old equipment. Rei, “Zero”, the co-writer of AimPoo (whom I have yet to meet in the flesh) has claimed my 21” CRT. Way to go! All right, I’m out. Later -Scott

Wow, what a long day. I’m writing this pass midnight which technically makes it Saturday morning. However for the sake of being able to make it look like I posted diligently on many days, I’ll adjust the timestamp on this entry to be an hour earlier so it falls under the Friday title. I haven’t been bogging in the last two days. I even surprised myself here… I would have thought myself to be the type to rush in and blog. The conditions were never right I guess. Even now, I’m not in a very comfortable work environment. My laptop is high on my desk and my chair is low and my arms stretch far and my elbows are hitting the glass of the desk and getting uncomfortable. I will now make a choice. Do I choose to stay like this and make a fast blog, or do I choose to relocation my laptop and finish somewhere else. I’ll choose the second option, luckily for you. Hold on just a second while I move this thing… there; much better. Well, since I’m going to be here for a while, I had might as well be formal about this. Grab some goldfish, dig through the fridge to find a nice cold coke, sit down, and enjoy today’s blog. I’m not sure what I’m going to say that will make today’s blog better or different from the others yet, but hey, you can find out with me!

No computers!? I don’t know what it is… all the sudden I can’t do anything right. I’ll start out with the biggest thing. A few weeks ago my friend (Jon) left for another state on vacation. He told me he wanted me to fix his computer and he left it on his doorstep and gave me his address (he lives about 45 minutes away from me). I finally got to his house (two days later! Eek! I was so busy!) and picked up his PC. I threw it in the back of my car and it stayed there for a few days. (He wasn’t getting back for a while, so I wasn’t in any rush – especially since I had so many other things I needed to do) A few days later I moved it from the truck to my room. Over the week prior, I had gotten about fifteen computers to look at, pick over, scrap, give away, and/or throw away. I gave away some of the stuff. I threw away some of the stuff. I traded some of the stuff. Anyway, yesterday I get a message on my answering machine from “Jon” telling me to call him back. “Oh crap!”, I thought to myself, “I forgot to fix his computer. I’ll go and do that before I call him.” I went to my room and looked for the computer. “That’s odd”, I slowly said to myself, “I thought I put it right next to all the other computers…” I knew that “it” was a possibility… but no… I wouldn’t have… right? After an hour or so of inspecting all my computers and equipment and walking around the house and garage looking for that computer, I couldn’t find it. I figured it must have gotten taken with the other junk I had laying around. It was a decent computer (1.4 MHz with 256mb DDR). Without much thought, I knew that the best thing to do would be to offer to replace it. How stupid of me… Anyway, I called the number “Jon” left on the answering machine. I started telling him about his computer and it turns out that it wasn’t “Jon”, but “John”, another guy I know. (I know too many Jon’s!) I was a little relieved that I didn’t have to call back with bad news, but I was also a little reluctant to initiate a call with bad news. It ended up working out all right though. I got Jon to give me enough info over the phone to give me an idea of what he had (since I never even got to power it up!). I thought I was going to have to make the (really long) trip to a hardware dealer to get the parts to replace his computer, but it ended up that his description matched perfectly with a system that I already had in my room. I felt really bad (and also didn’t feel good about giving him ‘used’ hardware) so I tricked it out w/ all sorts of cool stuff. Aside from 4 cd, dvd, and cdrw drives, I gave him 512mb of DDR ram (he had 256mb originally) and a nicer motherboard than he had previously, along with a case that might look very familiar. Actually, there’s one little detail that I didn’t actually tell him, and I probably should have, but I figured I’d blog it out so if he happens to read it, he’s far enough away that I don’t have to worry about him trying to run at me with a bat. The fact is that, well, the computer I gave him was actually my main computer! It’s ok though, I have a laptop that I can work on. Other than that though, I have a single headless (no monitor, keyboard, or mouse) server (running Linux) that powers my website and acts as a fileserver. I can live on my laptop, no sweat. I never liked those six monitors anyway. Just think of how much less eye strain I’ll have! Ok, I sound dumb. Anyway, I figured I’d go all the way with this and finish giving away all my stuff. I only wan to keep my laptop and my little server. I’m just… I don’t know why. I don’t know why I’m doing it, I just feel like I really need to. I have so much stuff… I have so many computers… I do so much on these stupid processing boxes that I can’t even function in real life. I’m losing peoples’ computers! I think that shoots up a little red flag saying “Scott, wake up!” Anyway, I’m not going into computers or engineering in school after all, so I guess I don’t have to worry bout “keeping up.” Actually, since so many of the custom hardware on this laptop has closed source drivers that are windows only, I don’t think I’ll be able to “live” on the Linux (slackware) partition of this notebook. In other words, I guess I’ll be using Windows from now on. It doesn’t matter though, really. All I want is a text editor for working on my website, a web browser for the net, a way to type papers, and maybe email every once and a while. This will be fine. /sigh/ I think even six months ago, I never could have foreseen this… Maybe, just maybe, one of these days I’ll order the parts to build a really nice little computer, and just use it. That’s right, for the first time in many years I’d actually buy my own computer instead of trying to put together pieces of other peoples’ old hardware. I’d probably shell out around 400$. I guess I’ll need to re-buy everything. I don’t have any more DDR ram (gave that all away) and I have tons of nice large IDE hard drives but, oh yeah, they’re IDE. I think I might splurge on one of those new ATA hard drives. I have a DVDRW drive (that I haven’t used even once since I got it last September) already. I’ll need a new motherboard. I’ll need a new processor. I’ll need a new case. I’m set on monitors. I’m good on keyboards, mice, and that sort of thing. If I do make a computer, it will be worth it. I’ll have a lot of fun doing it. I haven’t built a computer for myself in quite some time, I’m sure it’ll be nice… but I’m still holding this as a “right around the corner” thing. In other words, I don’t have a need for it yet, so I’m content staying like I am, knowing that I could build it at any time if a situation presents itself where I need it. We’ll see what happens.
In my noon class today I did something stupid. Actually, the stupidity came this morning. Wow, I always get ahead of myself, don’t I? Let me back up. Wednesday night I did a ton of Chemistry homework that was due Thursday morning. I got to Chemistry class Thursday morning and had discovered that the homework was done incorrectly. I made one little mistake, and duplicated the mistake on all the pages of my written home work. If turned in, I’d most definitely get a zero. I discovered that a large percentage of the class did the same thing I did, and I got the teacher to agree to extend the due date to allow for the time compensation of having it redone. He gave us another 24 hours (which was really nice of him, I mean, wow, I don’t think I would have done that!). Anyway, that night I was in my math class (boring!) so I whipped out my chemistry homework and started knocking it out (correctly, this time). I finished my Chemistry homework five minutes before the end of my math class. Go Scott! I slid the homework in my math folder and put it in my backpack. Friday morning I had a morning class starting at 10am, so I was going to turn it in before class. I grabbed my chemistry folder and went to the car. I got there a little early so I could swing by the Chemistry teacher’s office and slide my homework under the door. When I got to the school and started climbing stairs, I opened up the chemistry folder and rummaged through the papers for my homework. That’s strange, why isn’t it there? Oh crap! (seems to be my new common line these days) I did it in math class and slid it in my math folder! It was due in two hours, and my three hour class started in five minutes! I couldn’t skip that class because I had to turn in a test. I went to the professor and told him in fifteen seconds what happened and he’s like, “do you know how to do arrays in C?” To make a long story short, he gave me two hours. As long as I was back one hour before class ended, I’d get full credit. So I hopped in m car and drive for 45 minutes to get home. Then I couldn’t find my homework… 30 minutes later I found it! Then the 45 minute drive back to deliver it… I slid it under his door at 11:55 (I knew he’d get in right at noon; this guy’s disgustingly punctual) and raced to my other class and got there just in time. Then class ended so I drive 45 minutes back home. To top it off, tonight I drove BACK to the college (actually, an area really close to it) to meet Jon to give him his computer. Then I drive back home again. In other words, today I made that trip six times!

Many people lately have been inquiring as to the current status of my “no talking online” stunt. In case you haven’t heard, I’m not talking on AIM for thirty days. Some people have also asked and, no, it’s not related to Lent. The current date of re-use of AIM is scheduled for Wednesday, April 21’st. Also, I’ll go on and confess. I cheated, but it was of good reason! I used it to convey messages between Jon and myself last night and a little today. I’m a failure… well maybe not completely… just mostly. I try to make a simple little rule and I can’t even stick to it. Could I, I wonder, have held something “more important”? Ahh, forget it. Anyway, yeah, I’m a little disappointed, but it was for a good reason (or at least started off as that, anyway, before ending up as small talk) so I’m not too worried. Just, no more, okay? And also I have a bone to pick with some of the people who’ve been IMing me lately. Can you not read my away message? Are you pretending to ignore it? Some people amaze me. Today I got a “Scott, I see you’re not talking on AIM for thirty days, but I have a Linux question.” I can’t believe he had the guts to ask me something like that. Anyway, after warning him to 35% (I was just… frustrated like you couldn’t imagine) I slammed the lid of my laptop down and got up and left. Some people, it’s amazing. When will it stop!? I’m giving up completely. The next person who IMs me asking computer help will be ignored or simply warned. The next person who emails me a computer question will get a reply, with a fun little virus attached that damages windows files so it won’t boot again after it’s restarted. The next person that calls me for computer help will get yelled at. Heck, I practically threw away all my computers and I… how should I put it… “I wash my hands of this.” If you want computer help, get it elsewhere. Computers, that’s in my past man, it’s not my future, and the present is conflicted. So turn your little baby shoes one hundred and eighty degrees and start walking kid. I guess what I’m trying to say is that beside making a big change in my life (hey, for me going computer-less is a big thing) will be the perfect line drawing point at which I stop giving “help” to those who are too lazy to look it up themselves. Now, I won’t at all mind the occasional question. I’d be more than happy to give advice or an opinion on how to fix a computer or something. I’m not going to be doing any more of the “Scott, build me a computer”, “Scott, help me install Linux”, or “Scott, how do I set up a web server” sort of requests. I also don’t want to step on peoples’ feel though. Here’s my new policy. You have to ask before asking a computer question. Otherwise, the answer is automatically “…” (nothing / ignored). So, everyone note. If you want help, state your topic in a question something like this: “Scott, would you be willing to help me figure out what’s wrong with my computer? When the monitor isn’t plugged in the screen is black.” I’d either help you or not, but it’s worth a try =o)

Lamers are still claiming to hack me. GIVE IT UP! It’s amazing. I’m dumbfounded. It’s incredible. I just… I’m at a loss of words. I can’t imagine that some people are so stupid and have so little life that they… they… they just… they won’t shut up! These little people (Shynepo and TheBlackAlbum on aim are the dumbest by far) insult my intelligence, make me nauseous, sadden my heart, and make me wonder “Is there intelligent life on Earth?” I don’t know what these little dorks are smoking. Do they actually think that people believe them when they make outrageous [and incoherent or contradictory] threats toward people? I just… it really makes me sad. These people need to get a life. They need to stop being so stupid! I can’t imagine what kind of people these two will grow up to be, if they ever get there. I don’t know what runs through their head. Do they really think they’re threatening? Do they think they’re scary? Certainly they don’t really expect me to believe the loads of crap they send me, do they? It’s just… vahh… I’m over it.

It’s late. I think I need to start getting to bed. I’m home alone. I wanted to write a lot more in this entry (it’s definitely cut off) but I got sidetracked (as you can see from the length of the above paragraphs and the amount of incessant rambling I do in them) so I’ll have to write those things tomorrow. Hey, you’ll have something to look forward to, right? I’m going to be making a new commenting system soon, because this one is being messed with my immature children. Yes, you guessed it, SP and TBA are pretending to post as other people and type really stupid things. I did notice one thing that seemed funny. They thought “Kawaii” was a guy! How funny… Ok, I’m out. Later!

Too busy studying tonight to blog afterall…

I spent ten to fifteen minutes on my new layout. What do you think?

Then I spent too much time working on the new version of venomcrack!

Now, I have to do chemistry homework. Yuk!

As an “I’m Sorry” for not blogging, I’ll give you this: chase.wmv (let me know what you think)

I am Jack’s reclaimed time. Today I’m finally feeling a noticeable amount of extra time in my day. Long have the benefits of moderation been forgotten, only to be replaced with petty and insignificant desires of the self and obsessions of the mind. Last night I was able to get a lot done. I even spent some time and wired up a really nice speaker system for my computer. I moved some (unused) equipment from the area around my TV and set it up around my computer. Yes, it would be much better to watch movies with the nice audio equipment, but I watch my TV about one thousandth as much as I listen to music on my computer (this is true). I figured, well, why not. I spent a little while with my soldering gun tipping speaker wire and wiring up some new connectors. Thankfully I was able to find a box of empty RCA connectors that I was able to solder onto some extra speaker wire I had laying around. I need some more wire so I can (properly) hook up my rear speakers (right now I’m using twisted pair cat5 Ethernet cable) but for now it works. The advantage of this new arrangement is clarity. This little rig is so sweet (for me, at least). It is five channels of surround sound and a pretty respectable sub (under the desk). I guess that brings me to six speakers; right, left, center, rear right, rear left, and subwoofer. The equalizer is cool too. I have it within arms reach of my computer chair, but it has a remote that uses RF instead of IR signals to transmit the data. The advantage of this is that the radio frequencies (RF) are more or less omni directional. I can point the remote in any direction anywhere in my room and it works just as well. This is much better than the inferred (IR) remotes that are so common these days. Obsessed am I? Obsessed I am. Maybe I’ll actually get a halfway decent sound card one of these years. Right now I’m running on a card with the advance logic als4000 chipset, which is decently supported in Linux, but is prone to soft hisses and pops when turned up loudly. Also, remember that when I say “turned up loudly” I don’t mean to imply that I listen to loud music. I listen to very quiet music (especially recently, some of the older German operas, don’t ask) and have to turn it up often to be able to hear it well. I cringe when I turn up the volume only to hear the annoying and seemingly inescapable shhhhh sound. If I close my eyes, it almost sounds like a waterfall. Drown me. I wouldn’t go so far as to call myself an audiophile, but then again it’s all relative. Someone who is obsessed would say I’m perfectly normal, while someone who is perfectly normal would say that I’m obsessed. I guess I’m somewhere in the middle, which works out for me. Ok, I think I’m done with the topic. How does that sound?

I stayed awake in my morning class today! You make think it’s a coincidence, but I believe it has something to do with my early retirement last night. Hold the phone. Am I the only eighteen year old guy who uses the word “retire” instead of “go to bed”? I can vividly remember saying things like “before I retire” or “retire until morning”, etc. I wonder if it sounds stupid to other people. Ok, continuing on. This morning I was wide awake in class and alert. Then again, it’s Tuesday, and I’m always awake in my morning Chemistry class. My early math classes are a challenge though, because I usually know everything they’re talking about. Chemistry on the other hand, chemistry is a challenge! I have to pay attention so I can put up a fight (in my own mind, at least) and do well. I really need to make sure I get the highest grades possible in the sciences… especially if I do end up going in the medical area. Anyway, I kept glancing over at the girl that sits beside me. With her eyes usually closed, her head resting on her arm, and her neck gently tilted, I was under the impression that she was phasing in and out of reality and drifting into the realm of light sleep. I watched as her head slowly kept tilting to the right. It slowly kept twisting… slowly… more and more… and then… Snap! Her head rolled off her hands and put pressure (torque) on her neck and caused her to jerk her head up with eyes wide open. I turned away and looked back at the board but something about the incident hit me as funny… I started chuckling quietly. “Are you laughing at me?”, she asked. “A little bit” ^_^

Yuk. I need to go write an entrance essay. I was accepted into UCF last year, but I ended up not going at the last minute. I’m going to start taking classes there soon, but since a year has passed since I was accepted, I have to re-apply. I’m sure I’ll get accepted again, but I have to write a 500 word essay. I know what you’re thinking. “Scott, you sit on your laptop and pull a seven thousand word blog out of your butt, you’re worrying about a 500 word essay?” Well, no, it’s not like that. You see, here (in my blog, that is) I can write about anything and make myself appear however I’d like. I try to remain somewhat passive and humble in my writing. Who wants to be around a stuck-up person? The problem is that these little essays are where you’re supposed to brag. It’s where you’re supposed to sound stuck up. It’s where, well, you just talk about yourself! I hate that. I’m not sure why. I don’t have doubt that I can easily do it, but dang, I don’t like it! I guess it’s some deeply buried mental voice that whispers, “Scott, bad things will happen if you say that.” If I were to post tonight, for example, on how good I am at everything and how smart I am and how wonderful of a person I am, I doubt I’d have positive responses. Ok, enough about this topic. No one really cares, do they? I’ll write one more paragraph I guess, and then I’m out.

Music. My preferences in the subject seem to shift constantly. I thought I’d take the time to give everyone a little update. I mentioned German opera earlier in this post, so I thought I’d go on and dump the full story. First of all, I peevishly reject American contemporary slash popular music. I don’t want to sound bad here, and I want to make it clear that I don’t look down upon people who listen to music I don’t like, all right? Got it? Good. Anyway, I have seen so many people helplessly wrapped in the invisible twines of popularity and social acceptance. People so often (mainly in middle and high school) dress, act, look, and talk like the people they’re around to try and fit in. I read the “about me” page on a girl’s website a long time ago and I was struck with one comment she made when asked what kind of music she listens to. “I listen to pop music so I can be popular.” Doesn’t this seem sad? Anyway, I’ve always tried to stay away from the newest and most common forms of… everything, in an attempt to keep my head above the crowd and see with unclouded eyes. Basically, I just listen to what I like. Something I don’t like is when a song has really shallow lyrics. What’s your favorite song? If you were to write the lyrics on a paper, would anyone want to read them? If the lyrics are stupid, bad, immature, or about “love” (!) then wouldn’t you be associated with, of, or by those things? I’m not making my point clear. I don’t know how to say my point. Stupid words subtract from the music. In my opinion, if I’m going to listen to music with words, those words have to be pretty incredible, or in another language so I can make up whatever meaning I want to for them. Over 99% of the music I listen to is either purely instrumental or in another language (Japanese, Korean, Chinese, German, or some other [Eastern] language, in that order). I’m the type of person to get “stuck” on one thing for a while, grow sick of it, then move to something else. While editing that video clip I posted yesterday, I was reminded of the days when I’d spend so much time listening to German and Russian opera. You know that song that plays when the girl dies in the clip I put up the other day? Yeah, that is “Auf dem Wasser zu singen” by Franz Schubert. I’m sure kazaa has it, if you get bored some day, leech it! Schubert is long dead, I’m sure he won’t mind ^_-

Well, I’d better get going. I have a short essay to write, some chemistry to study, and some math homework to get started on. I have a night class tonight, but I get back early (7:30ish) tonight and will probably have some more time to… do whatever. Another major room cleaning is on my agenda. Also, as far as the webcam thing goes, I’m so fed up with the stupid camera and people asking me to fix it that. So… yeah, I’m considering disabling it for a while. Of course, that’d mean I’d have to change my layout back… or maybe make a new layout? What’s this about a new layout? What about that really “cute” thing you were going to write about? Later folks, possibly later tonight…

28 days remaining…

Wow, I’m posting twice today. How cool is that? Humm, not very. Anyway, it’s fairly late at the time I’m starting to write this, so I doubt it will be long. I’ll try to stick to the point, but you know how I am. There’s no telling what I’m going to end up talking about tonight. Everyone should be noticing by now that since I’m not IMing (for 30 days), I’m putting some of that time into writing this blog. Thus, my blog will be updated at least once a day (and sometimes more!) If you’re at all interested in “keeping up”, make sure you check my site every day! If possible, check it multiple times every day. By doing this you can see the posts early enough to be able to comment on them. I instinctively only look at comments on the most recent posts, so if you have anything important to write make sure you post it on the most recent entry. Actually, if you have something important to write, email me! KnightHacker@cfl.rr.com is the address, all right?

I’ve been getting large amounts of stupid IMs. Yes, I’ve decided to read my incoming IMs after all. Some of them, at least… they’re easily erased so seriously, if you have anything important, email it to me or call me with it, all right? Ok, good. Anyway, returning to the topic of these stupid IMs. Allow me to read one of them to you. “Scott I think AimPoo is [messing] with my computer. Please IM me when you get back.” Well, in 29 days he’ll get an IM from me all right. Surprisingly TBA and SP (The Black Album and Shyne Po) haven’t tried to contact me. It’s amazing. I feel better already. This little “I will read incoming IMs but not send any back” is being teased by some people I know. Today I got a “Scott IM me within the next two minutes if you’re in, I have a 1.6ghz notebook that no one’s claiming and you can have it for 50$ so if you want it IM me right now.” Yesterday I got a “Scott, I have a proposal.” The first one was hard because I knew (or thought) I was missing out on something cool. The second one ate at my mind ALL day. Who the heck sends those five words and never finishes his own thoughts? In case the person who wrote it is reading this, I’m just being silly, don’t take it too seriously! Anyway, it’s like, hello! Type it out. Oh well, I guess I’ll have to try to sleep tonight knowing that it might have been something absolutely incredible that I just missed out on.

Wow, what a large amount of feedback I got dealing with that last video clip I put on my website less than twelve hours ago! I got countless IMs and even a few emails (along with the comments) about that little video clip. The Mp3 section is interesting, but it’s little more than a toy. No one really cares about audio these days. Video though… Video seems to still be “new” on the net. If you get a guy acting like an idiot in front of a microphone, no one will want to listen to it. If you get a guy acting like an idiot in front of a video camera, you’d be amazed how many people want to watch. Would you still bother with [insert your favorite TV series here] if it were sound only? Certainly this is an interesting thought. Well, I doubt I’ll be posting some more videos any time soon. I haven’t checked to see what kind of damage that last clip did to my bandwidth, but I don’t think I’ll be able to do it too often. Yes, I know, I don’t really have to worry about bandwidth (I’m close friends with a guy who owns a hosting company, so he takes care of me), but I do want to be polite to the guy and not take advantage of my situation (for which I am very grateful!)

Well, that was short, good night time. I have something really interesting to write about tomorrow morning. I’ll definitely need all of your help in pushing me to make a decision about something. I guess it’s not ultimately important, and not exactly the most constructive. However it’s something that I really want to give some thought to. It’s something that the guys will roll their eyes at… and something most girls will roll their eyes at… but something that some girls might find really “cute”. It’s something with so little purpose, but so much meaning! It’s something with so many possibilities. It’s something that can change the way I think about so much. It’s something that I can use to help me to do and think so many things! It’s something really cool, in my opinion. After its [hypothetical] completion, I think it’ll prove to be something I’ll be glad I did. Yeah, don’t you wish you knew what I am talking about? Tune in around lunchtime tomorrow and I’ll write about it. Later!

Didn’t expect me to post again so soon, did ya? Well, some interesting things have happened lately so I thought I’d take a little bit of time and write about them. As you’ve most likely noticed from yesterdays’ post, I’m starting to write shorter blogs that have more meaning. Hopefully with some conscious action I can kick my infinite rambling habits! Then again, is it such a bad thing? If nothing else, my ramblings are from my mind and escape through my fingers into the keyboard and end up as text. In other words, they’re unique to me. Even though they may seem like senseless ramblings (very much like the few sentences you’re reading now) they hold the figurative fingerprint of Scott and are therefore unique to me. Something else that’s somewhat unique to me (at least I like to think so, at least) is my strange usage of tenses and persons. I will sometimes switch tenses without warning or consistency. However I always give thought to keeping it grammatically accurate, unlike how I used to be. There, see? In the last three sentences I referred to myself in the future, present, and the past. Scott also talks about himself sometimes. By this I mean he says his own name in the third person. No longer is this blog written from the first person point of view. Oh yeah, as if that’s not confusing enough, wait until you see how he switches back and forth without any real reason? I like to try to keep my readers on their toes just a little bit by keeping a level horizon while shifting the boardwalk. Oh my, is this a strange metaphor? That’s another thing. I’ll keep using (sometimes re-using) strange references that don’t seem to make too much sense. When read lightly, these strange references are (to me, at least) very interesting and above all, unique. One of my favorite lines is “clinging onto my sanity by the very fingernails of my existence”. I imagine sanity as a dark black rocky wall to which I’m hanging on by the tips of my fingers. You know the feeling you get if you slowly pull your fingernails back? It hurts. It hurts like crazy. Below me is insanity itself. Doesn’t that little line sound so much cooler now? Maybe next time you’ll stop and pay attention when I say I’m “clinging onto my sanity by the very fingernails of my existence”. All right, enough with my uniqueness. Onto the blog!

So, how’s that “no computer” stuff going? Well, like I said (or hinted at) before, I’m not COMPLETELY stopping the computer. I blog, I do school, and I read some emails and Instant Messages (although I definitely for sure will not respond to IMs). Surprisingly, only two people sent me their phone number in the last 12 hours (when I posted yesterday’s blog). However, I’m not sure if I have the guts to call anymore. Last night it sounded like a great idea. But now, upon the realization that one of these people (a girl) actually lives near me, my curious little sense of PF (phone fright) is starting to kick in. I- I’m not sure Ic- c- can h- han- an- andle that-t. Oh well, we’ll see what happens. I’m thinking I might be a little shortcutty and set up a computer for AIM’s “voice chat” feature. I think it’ll be a lot easier than using phones, and hey, it beats paying long distance calling card charges! Anyway, I’m still feeling “blah” about everything computerish. I know I’ll hook up my webcam again soon, but I just don’t feel like it. User authentication for blog postings? I’ll probably do that too, but I don’t feel like it. I never thought I’d turn into this. I’ve always been so obsessive about getting things done on the computer. I just don’t really care anymore. Maybe in the time away from it I’ll start to regain my ‘normal’ mental framework regarding the computer work and work work and school work and stuff like that. Ok, new paragraph here.

It’s taking me forever to read this stupid book! I guess I’m not spending much time on it. I’ll spend ten minutes here, fifteen minutes there, once or twice a week. I’m on chapter 51 (of 79) of Koushun Takami’s Battle Royale (the title of the book) and it’s definitely getting better and better. For those of you who haven’t heard of it, Battle Royale is a story (recently translated into English) that I heard was really cool. I found it had a movie and was able to acquire it. (Japanese) The movie was pretty good, but the book is really awesome because you have the advantage of being able to get a deeper story. Instead of things being quickly thrown at you in bits and pieces, the book has the ability to go into detail and spend time developing each character. The translation is also pretty interesting. It’s obvious that the translator is trying to copy the author as closely as he can, but it creates some strangely flowing paragraphs of short and blunt sentences at times. All right, once again, time for a plot overview. A class of students in Japan is randomly selected to participate in the Battle Royale Survival Program. The students think they’re going on a school study trip and are gassed while on the bus. They wake up on an island with metal collars around their necks. They’re told that the collars have explosives in them and are set to detonate if they are tampered with or of they are triggered by an official. The rules are simple. Every student is given an object (binoculars, a pistol, a paper fan, something completely random) that they can use. As for the goal of the game, the students have to try to kill each other off. In 72 hours there can be only one survivor. If there is more than 1 person alive after three days, all of the collars detonate. Also, the island is divided into sections. Every six hours (4 times a day) a new “danger zone” is added. If a student walks into a danger zone, his or her collar instantly detonates. This way the students are forced to keep moving. The ironies that are created are simply amazing. I can’t begin to describe how cool some of these little parts really are. If you’re not a reader, check out the movie. It’s rated the Japanese R-15 (somewhere between PG13 and R for MPAA standards) and is just… it’s a cool movie. My favorite part of the movie is Chigusa’s last few moments. If you haven’t seen the movie yet and would like to, you might not want to read the rest of this paragraph! Also, note that the book’s description of what happens here is not the same as the movie. They had to tone it down in the movie because it was only R-15. Anyway, the basic little story is like this. The girl is finding comfort in running. She has her jogging clothes on and her friend (a guy) is riding a bike beside her with a stopwatch. Light opera music plays in the background. Green trees all around, a nice smooth dark road is beneath them. It’s a really beautiful setting, which adds to the irony of the ultimately morbid reason they’re there in the first place. Both collars are clearly visible. Anyway, light conversation arises. The boy asks “How far can you run?” to which the girl replies “I will always run ahead of you”. The guy smiles and says “Then I will always protect you”. Chigusa smiles and laughs a little (while still running). Then you see a view from the treetops (really cool camera angle) and you see her stop on the side of the road and jog in place and look around her. The guy is gone. A few events happen, and she ends up killing a boy that attacks her (in self defense) but it causes a lot of screaming. A girl (who is an avid player of this “game” and who also has a pistol) is attracted to the sound and watches what happens. Once Chigusa kills the boy she gets up and looks around and sees the girl who was hiding in the bushes. Armed only with a knife, Chigusa turns the other way and sprints off. The girl leaps out of the bushes and starts firing her pistol. One of the shots hits Chigusa in the lower back ripping through her chest, but she continues running. Here, the book spends some time and describes the thoughts that flow through Chigusa’s head as she keeps running… running… without reason or purpose. She knows that she’s going to die, but it doesn’t affect her. She just has to keep running. When she stops, she collapses. This is the cool part. She’s not really dead yet, she’s just too weak to get up. You can see she’s right on the edge of losing consciousness and it’s obvious from the position of the bullet wound that one she slips out of it, she’s not coming back. In the film, you see her thoughts in the traditional Japanese cinema style. (For those of you who don’t watch Asian movies, this is done by fading to a black screen and showing white letters upon the black background, indicating her thoughts in the first person). She prays and asks God for comfort, and seconds later a guy from her class finds her. They only exchange a few words, but the guy acts really nice. She asks him to hold her “it won’t be long now” and he starts to cry. She looks at him, smiles, and says “thank…” and loses consciousness. The guy still holds her, propped up against the wall, crying quietly. The opera music slowly gets louder as the camera zooms out slowly. It’s just… it’s an awesome scene for me. I don’t know why. I think it strikes something in me somewhere, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Hey, I have an idea. I’ll see about putting the clip on the site. Ok, more on that later. By the way, someone (I know) will ask, “but Scott, how does the book differ?” Well, it differs in the way she kills the person who attacks her. The movie shows her wrestle (more like roll down a muddy hill) then stab him five or six times with a large knife. In the book, she pins him down and gouges out his eyes with her fingernails. The craziest part is the book goes into details like how it felt on her thumbs when they were in his sockets. Ok, I know I’m going to get a, “Scott, give me examples!” Well, I won’t do that, but I will tell you that it goes into some detail about the warmth of the blood, the difference of the feeling between the inner eye fluid compared to the blood, the way her fingers feel inside his eye sockets, etc. Yeah, it’s nuts. Anyway, I think I should wrap up this paragraph before I scare everyone off! Oops, too late. Ok, I edited up a little section of the movie so you can see what I’m talking about. I’ll make it downloadable at the bottom of this blog. In fact, I’m done with this blog. So I’ll make it available right here.

DOWNLOAD VIDEO CLIP HERE! Before you can download, you have to read this, ok? First of all this clip isn’t the most “family friendly”. Although I did edit out the stabbings and gunshots and most of the blood and stuff like that, you do see a gun go off and you do hear gasping and you do see some blood etc. So, I wouldn’t flaunt it in front of the 6 year olds (like TheBlackAlbum). Once again, I edited the clip a lot, so it’s only a few seconds here and there of a good ten minute scene. I cut out most of the dialogue to keep it interesting for people who decide to watch it. I know I’ll smack my forehead for putting this up for everyone to see, but hey, I like it! Ok, before you get it know that the subtitles aren’t great (I didn’t do them). Also, I forgot to mention the irony at the end of the scene. The music keeps playing, but the story keeps on going. It doesn’t stop to pause at all. Also, some of the words don’t match up to what I said. I was quoting a different subtitle’d version of the flim. So.. It’s just… whatever. Here: [brgirl.avi]
note: you may need to install [this] if the video doesn’t show up (divx 5.1 codec)

Let me know what you think of the clip!

29 days remaining…

You win; I surrender. To those of you who incessantly pester, annoy, taunt, and try to hurt me: good bye. I’ve had an eerie feeling the last few days. This feeling (of a need to place distance between myself and the outside world) had grown stronger and stronger throughout today. Finally, tonight, upon checking me email inbox… snap. Did you hear that? That was my spine. Listen to me moan and watch me collapse. Although I know I will sound like a very weak person, I have to say that the things I’ve been doing and the things I’ve been exposing myself have taken a [degrading] toll on my mind. Slowly, the strikingly familiar blanket of apathy smothers the aspects of my life… one by one, I can only watch in nostalgia as the very things I care for fizz into nothingness. In short, I’m thinking too much about too much. I need to place more focus on the things that are important. I need to stop exposing myself to people who will influence me negatively. Hopefully, with whatever dignity I have left, I can pull myself together again to a state of order. Though perfect order is impossible to hold on to, I will be able to once again obtain a sense of direction. Ahh, the lovely feeling of purpose flows through the nostrils of opportunity. The days of spring are young. I hope that the warm and gentle breezes blowing over my mind will do me some good. Snap. What was that snap? Oh yes, my back. My back is still broken. I cannot place a band aid over insanity and hope for it to heal. I need to treat it at it’s source. When looking back on my life today, this week, this month, this year, and in all, I can’t help but notice one overwhelming large passionate obsession. I’ll assume you’re reading this via my website, so I know you most likely know exactly what I’m talking about. Rekki. No, Scott doesn’t have a girlfriend. Rekki, the age old name of Scott’s favorite computer, is no longer spoken in Scott’s room. But wait, Scott doesn’t have a “Rekki” anymore now does he? I might even venture so far as to say that Scott’s current computer usage and online activities are based completely upon things that are irrelevant to Scott’s life or future. Favorite? How dare you suggest such a thing? Scott’s beginning to hate computers. Scott’s beginning to hate email. Scott’s beginning to hate talking online. Scott’s beginning to hate being around his computers at all. The fun has been baked out of Scott’s life and responsibility crusts on the edges. Something must be done. A radical change must occur. Scott needs more than a mental reboot. Scott needs a bios clearing. Instead of mentally rebooting by distancing himself from his computers for a day or two, Scott has decided to take this all the way. Is Scott trying to walk away from his frustrated qualms and the simple conflicts between himself and his projects and other people he meets online? No. He is not walking away from anything; he is running with all his strength.

No computer. 30 Days. Blog only. Simple rules, are they not? I think it’s pretty self explanatory. Starting March 22, 2004 I will ‘give up’ the computer. No longer will I be online talking to people or writing software in my spare time. I will only use my computer for basic school work and for blogging. Why? I hope it will give my mind the time it needs to put things back in perspective. Plus, I think this will prove to be an interesting way to learn about myself. Without the computer, what will I do? Will I make something really cool? Will I invent some new product? Will I meet a friend? Will I meet a girl? Yeah, I know, I’m getting ahead of myself. Nonetheless, you can see that I’m leaving. If you’re thinking, “Scott, but you didn’t warn me this would happen!” then don’t feel bad. I didn’t really tell anybody.

Scott, how can I contact you? Email knighthacker@cfl.rr.com (that’s the real address) and make the subject “SCOTT CALL ME”. In the message, tell me who you are (if I don’t already know you). Leave your phone number and a time that I should call. I will call you (with a calling card) and we can talk for a few minutes that way. Why am I doing it on the phone? Well first of all, it weeds out people who don’t really want to talk to me. Secondly, it keeps the conversations lifelike. Maybe, just maybe, I’ll get a glimpse at life through the eyes of the rare, “I realize there’s another human on the other side” style thinker. So, you know how to contact me. If you’re hesitating, go on and email me. I won’t feel at all bad calling you. Heck, if I don’t want to call you, I simply won’t call you. Anyway, yeah, that’s how you can contact me.

Scott, what the heck are you going to do for thirty days without the computer? That’s a very good question. In fact, I have no idea what the answer is. This unanswered question is simply another reason why I think it’s a good idea that I do this. I need to start distancing myself. I cannot remain like this forever. I’ve now decided that I’m definitely going to pursue a line of medical work as my profession. I can no longer consider the time that I spend on my computers learning new things “contributive and required for my future success”. Instead, I see these great lengths of time programming and reading as little more than an obsessive hobby. When I get older, when I move away, when I get married, when I have kids… I can not be the way I am now. I can not; I refuse. I will have to change eventually. I don’t see a reason why I shouldn’t “practice” now. All right, you’ve seen me pull an Al Gore in this paragraph. (talk for five minutes and say nothing) The honest truth is… I really don’t know why I’m doing this. I do think that it will be good for me though. I don’t know how it will be good for me, but I think it will be. I can only hope and pray that something good will come out of this. It will certainly be a difficult challenge to endure, but I think that if conquered, it will become an impressive and memorable event. One day, I’m sure, I will look upon these times and chuckle at my own stupidities. But for now? What else can I do. I’ll read. I’ll write. I’ll get out a little. Don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine. And, oh yes, I need all of your help. Don’t entice me to talk to you on IM! Don’t send me emails that I’m supposed to respond to (other than phone information) I’m going to hook up my webcam again soon so you can all watch me and see what I end up doing. Also, I’ll constantly be reading [and adding to, possibly] the comments sections of my posts. I plan to post almost every day for the next thirty days. I’m sure that it will be interesting. Well, it’s late, and I’d best be off. Goodnight everyone, and wish me luck!

30 days remaining…